monsanto’s latest monstrosity (and a call for submissions)

posted August 10, 2015

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Today my friends, I bring you, Monsanto’s latest attempt to brainwash the general public. Behold, their bogus almost hip, quasi-creative, whole-foods-inspired, minimalist, knock-off of a website that you might actually want to visit.

Why bring you this insult to everything decent and good, you might ask? Well, I’ll tell you. Working as a reporter a few years ago, I had the privilege of interviewing activists and historians about the failed ratification of the Equal Rights Amendment. Of all the interesting things people said to me in the process (and there were many), the one that has stuck with me the longest came from a social scientist who had written a book on the subject. She told me that, in retrospect, the ERA supporters had lost because of their failure to listen to or publicly address the arguments of their opponents. Basically, she said, “We thought that their claims and propaganda were so outlandish that the general public would dismiss them as quickly as we did,” whereas, in reality, the conservative’s campaign was highly effective in shifting the tide of public opinion against the amendment. “I wrote this book,” she told me, “as a cautionary tale for future movements.”

Point here is that, as exaggerated, factually-incorrect, and downright fantastical the claims of your opponents may be, it is still really really important to both listen to and address what they say.

This all being said, the Greenhorns is now accepting proposals via the comment section for subversion of this farce, including, but not limited to: satire, group action, and good old-fashioned mockery.